i'm hearing christmas songs. and this pathetic interpretation of the names of the months ending with -ber is the sole culprit.

correct me if i'm wrong but i think the reason why september to december ends with -ber is because the old calendar had ten months and sept-, oct-, nov-, and dec- are numerical prefixes preceding the latin word for month which sounds like "ber." but because a certain idiot fucked up the calendar by making it a 12-month year and naming the first two-thirds after roman gods and rulers, the calendar ended up having 4 months ending with -ber. and i'm quite sure, it's not because that crazy monk who re-arranged the calendar (baskog ka trip ya ba!) thought that christmas season should start this early.

i don't wanna sound here like the grinch but man, i think it's bullshit for prices to begin rise just because it's now a month ending with -ber. and you have all those ghosts and monsters on november and i can't seem to figure out how this -ber season works. is the christmas season suspended during halloween? i mean, you can't have santa claus and jack the ripper dancing together. they're just so incompatible. or that flying sleigh alongside that old lady on a broom (unless you're italian. i think they have a witch called la befana instead of santa claus). and you have all those stars and balls in one shelf and some ugly pumpkin and skeletal system in the other.you now have this 100-day countdown and duh, some jose mari chan christmas hits in the airwaves.

and this country, fooled by some enterprising moron who wanted to open shop early.


Secret Admirer

Your classmate- let’s call her Lady Jock, since she’s so into sports- walks you to your car. You both animatedly discuss different ways of killing Ma’am P’s dog. ‘How ‘bout feeding it poison while Ma’am’s scribbling something on the board?’ You were in themiddle of suggesting, when you spot Tanya, your bestfriend, as she excitedly runs towards you.

‘Nicole! Come here! Hurry!’ She drags you to the direction of your car.

‘Reaaaallllly cuuuute huh?’ she gushes.

You stare in surprise at the long-stemmed pink rose carefully threaded into the windshield wiper. You exhale a breathless ‘oh’, all the while turning around, hoping against hope that you would catch a glimpse of whoever had placed it there.

‘My best fwend’s got herself an admirer!’ Tanya gleefully declares.

Lady Jock, (er, let’s call her LJ instead) merely nudges you in the ribs, grinning.

‘Way to go Cole,’ She playfully quirks an eyebrow.

‘Hrmmm.’ You’re still looking around you, thoughtfully nitpicking your brain for possible candidates.

‘Brian? Nah, can’t be… he’s not the type. As forRamon… hell, no way…’ You furrow your brow while brainstorming.

And then you see him.

You’ve had your eye on him ever since you’ve been pitted against each other in a casual classroom debate. Tagged as one of the campus’s best debaters,he had looked you over and dismissed you with an airy grin. Naturally you got all infuriated. Naturally you vowed to win. And win you did.

You can’t get over how adorable he looked when he flashed you that dimple as he gracefully accepted defeat. And being not of the demure, faint-hearted mold, you showed him your dimple in return.

‘He’s now an official Super Crush.’ You had announced to Tanya.

And now here he is, smiling unabashedly at you, his long legs bringing him closer with every stride.

‘An admirer eh?' His eyes tease you as they peep between the strands of hair hanging over his forehead.

You shrug. ‘Maybe he got the wrong car.’

He raises an eyebrow. ‘No chance of that. I bet he’ll give you another flower or something. Just you wait.’He waggles a finger at you, then walks away.

True enough, little notes and more roses found their way to your car. One time, in the middle of a lecture, you went out of the classroom and wandered outside to smoke. When you got back, a sheet of pochacco stickers was clipped between the pages of your notebook. You look around in amazement. You catch SC’s eyes, and hepositively twinkles at you. You look down, absentmindedly unsticking a badminton-playing pochacco from the glossy sheet. LJ, who sits right beside you,whispers, ‘How cute.’ You turn to her. ‘Did you see who had placed this inside my notes?’ She looks puzzled. ‘Nah,’ She shakes her head. ‘ I went out too. Call of nature.’ She taps her pack of Marlboros.‘Looked for you pa gani.'

Sportsfest came and went, and your academic group emerged as the champion. There are the usual love notes during the victory party. You are carefully balancing a food-laden Styrofoam container on your knees, when you hear one of the emcees say your name.

'Ooh, how ‘bout this one? For Nicolette, you look likea porcelain Chinese doll. You’re simply adorable. Can we talk later?’ Jill purses her lips, pretending to be scandalized, and the room erupts with guffaws and‘uuuuuuuuyys’. You look around for SC, and when you finally do spot him, you see him giving you the thumbsup sign, while mouthing what looks like ‘way to go!’.

You sidle up to SC, and proceed to spend the rest of the night with him. With all the noise and wild partying going on around you, nobody notices that you two are on the verge of making out.

'Aren’t you with someone?’ You ask him coyly, your lips grazing his ear. ‘I’m with you.’ His hands are stealthily snaking to your butt. You try to shake him out of his drunken daze. ‘Don’t you have a girlfriend?’

‘No.’ Your ears are sore from all his nibbling.

'Well, do you at least like someone then?’ You plaintively fish, hoping that he would finally admit to being… well, your secret admirer.

‘Hmm. Curiosity kills the cat. Here kitty kitty.'

Ugh. You push him away. You watch him teeter for a moment, then laughingly collapse into the arms of the group huddling right beside you.

So this is his idea of romantic talk! You spot LJ shuffling towards you, and you vent your frustration out at her. ‘Why can’t he just admit it?! All I wantis to hear it from his own lips! WHY CAN’T HE JUSTFREAKING TELL ME?! Haaaay… it’ll be so much easier that way.’ You shake your head resignedly.

‘Um, Cole,’

‘What?’ You puff on your cigarette, still steaming inside. You look at LJ’s bowed head as she fidgets, her hands clasping then unclasping. When will this girl ever learn to relax, you wonder. She’s always so nervous… now especially. even with the chill in the air, her upper lip is dotted with small beads of sweat. You stare at her fingers in fascination as they proceeded to wring each other.

'Uh, Cole?’ there goes that hesitant tone again.


‘Um, see, he wasn’t the one who sent those notes and roses…’

You look up, and this time, your eyes meet hers. You have never seen a gaze filled with such longing, with such hunger.

‘We can’t talk with all these people around us.’ She mutters. ‘Wanna go somewhere more private?’ She looks at your mouth, then licks her lips.

You feel as if your dainty toes have taken root. Oh god, please no